Christmas Eve

This time of year always reminds me of my gaps and limitations.  There are so many things I can’t do.  I can’t bake enough cookies to give away to neighbors and friends and still have enough for the family.  (My mom always seemed to be able to do it!) I never send out enough Christmas cards or buy enough gifts.  There is always someone I leave out.  I forgot to get the butter out of the microwave last night when Suzie was baking our Christmas bread and I was helping her.  Hence, the Christmas bread is not moist and rich like it is meant to be.  Good natured, Bill suggested we just lather extra butter on top when we eat it!

Continuing on the theme of not enough.  I remember as a child opening my last present and being disappointed that there weren’t anymore pretty packages to open.  The gifts I give or receive aren’t always just right.  Sometimes they need to be exchanged for a different size or color. I also remember when taking back gifts, was the exception not the norm.  A gift was just that, something to be received and thankful for, not looked at with a critical eye as I’m taking it out of the box wondering if I can’t exchange it for something I like better.

I wonder if those who often suffer depression during this time, aren’t more keenly aware of these limitations.

Maybe this is just what I need reminding of each year.  Maybe this is the point of why that baby was born in a manger.  We could not do it ourselves.  We could not keep the laws of God perfectly to win our way back into his favor.  Our only hope was a Savior, champion, redeemer, who could do it for us.  And what a wonderful Savior he is! Yet, in his humanity he also experienced limitations.  Was that why he said his disciples would do greater things than he did?  We collectively, over the centuries, empowered by the Holy Spirit, pooling all our resources and talents would be able to accomplish more than one man on his own could do?

I am learning that it is OK to have limitations.  In fact, it is just how it is, so the sooner I accept that, the more at peace I will be.  I cannot save the world, but I have a part.  Sometimes that part seems insignificant , but it is my part and added to the whole it is making a difference in the world.